Hangover Omelette

So, on Friday night I went out.  To make new friends, who knew some of my old friends.  It's a simple concept - you all arrive at a pub, share a table with some strange faces and at the end of the night - two pints of cider, a double Amaretto, and a lot of ill-advised conversations about one's personal life - you invite them back to your house for some Sloe Gin.

That night you remember that you are drunk, and very so, because it has now been Saturday for four hours.  So you drink a lot of water.  Nevertheless when you get up on even-more-Saturday morning, you have a headache and not a lot of motivation.  I prescribe:

1) Lots of water, and no caffeine - coffee and tea are diuretics and will make you more dehydrated.
2) Fizzy-good-make-feel-nice (alka-selzer) or paracetemol, for the immediate problem.
3) Hangover omelette.  You Will Need:

2 eggs
a splash of milk
bowl
butter
stirry spatula
leftover potatoes (or something)
sharp knife and board
frying pan
ketchup, to serve if desired

Melt a large knob of butter in the frying pan.  Slice the potatoes if using and fry them in the butter until browned and sticking annoyingly to the pan.  Add more butter.  Beat the eggs with a little milk in the bowl, and tip them into the hot pan.  Allow them to cook undisturbed for a minute, then try to turn over sections of the omelette one spatula at a time.  Shuffle the resulting chunks of eggy potatoey goodness around a bit until cooked through.  Flop onto plate.  Reflect dizzily how lucky it was that you didn't throw up, as that is what this creation reminds you of.  Put ketchup on it.  Remember to get a knife and fork out of the drawer to eat it with.  Serve with more water and a side of remorse.

4) Go back to bed to think about what you've done, and add some people on Facebook.

Sloe Gin

Sloes are a strange beast.  I always knew what they were, and that they existed, thanks to my Flower Fairies books, but had never noticed one until quite recently.  A bitter relative of the damson, they are only really suitable for flavouring alcohol - making the famous Gin, which is where most people encounter them.  We harvested ours from the boyfriend's dad's locality in the New Forest; there is a small tree near the railway into Wimbledon from Surbiton and also in the Christian Science carpark near my house.  They're around, if you keep looking.
The sloe season is October-November; sloe gin season is from Christmas that year to October next year.  It makes excellent G&Ts.  Depending on how sloey you want your gin, leave it to steep for 3-6 months to decant in Advent or Lent.

I'm afraid I can't offer you a proper proportion recipe to make Sloe Gin; everyone who makes it has their own ideas of how sweet, sloey or ginny it should be when it's finished.  I would recommend making a small amount to slightly different proportions and see which you like best. Here's how we did it:

Sloe Gin
You Will Need: Harvesting bag/box/bucket, freezer, £££, gin, caster sugar, empty bottles, weighing scales, patience, large jugs, sives, funnels.

1. Go to the supermarket and work out how much 'raw' gin - Gordons or other - you reckon you can afford. Then buy it.  Now have a stiff one and try to forget about it.  Gin is expensive.
2.  Armed with a gin-to-sloes ratio - the BBC reckons a litre wants a pound of fruit - go and pick your sloes! Beware of the large thorns.  Pick as many as you need; if you get a few more, they'll keep in the freezer.
3.  Freeze the fruit in shopping bags overnight.  This splits the skins and allows the juices to get out.
4.  Pour one bottle of gin into a jug.  Half-fill the empty bottle with sloes; fill the bottle a third of the way up with sugar.  Finally, pour as much gin as possible back in using a funnel.  Seal the bottle, turn it over and over a few times to mix in the sugar, and leave to stand in a cool dark place like a bedroom cupboard.
5.  Repeat until you've run out of bottles or gin, freeze any remaining sloes, and engage Patience.
6.  Wait 3-6 months before choosing a long afternoon to Decant.
7.  Open the bottles; with a sieve strain the berries out of the liquid into a large jug.  Pour the decanted liquid back into the empty bottles using a funnel.  If going for consistency, try to mix up the liquids from different bottles in the jug; if trying for taste, endeavour to keep batches separate.
8.  Home-made labels and a little purple ribbon can go a long way to making these products into a great summer birthday present, or (if waiting only 3 months) Christmas present.

Glug Glug Glug...